The Forgotten Skill of Listening to Understand, Not Respond

Hi, I'm Hira — a technology leader, product marketer, writer, and entrepreneur with over 11 years of experience building and marketing tech products.

Currently, I lead product marketing at WrangleWorks, a SaaS platform that automates data work.

I've also founded and led two companies: CaterpillHERs and Koi.work. This newsletter helps me stay connected with the incredible network I've built over the years.

Thank you to 2,300+ of you who read this!

More about me here and here.

In Episode 52, here's what's on the agenda:

💡 Insights: We hear people, but are we truly listening?

📰 Key Takeaway: Listening isn’t passive.

Some people like the sound of their voice.

I wasn’t surely one of them but I definitely didn’t like awkward silence either.

I didn’t always know how to listen.

Early in my career, I thought listening meant waiting for the other person to stop talking so I could chime in. That’s what conversation is, right?

Two people… talking… and talking… and talking

Meetings would end, and I’d feel confident about how much I’d contributed, only to realize later that I’d missed key points, talked over my colleague and had to apologize, or worse, misinterpreted what someone really meant.

It wasn’t until I had a tough feedback session with a coach that I learned the difference between hearing and truly listening.

They said, “You’re so anxious to respond that you’re not listening. Slow down, and you’ll listen and understand more than just words.”

That advice hit home.

I am not fully there but now I pay attention to how I approach conversations. I don’t dread awkward silence. I don’t speak when I don’t have to.

I listen. Not to fix, not to answer, but simply to understand.

Why listening is a ultimate skill for leaders?

We don’t talk enough about listening.

Not the polite nodding or the “uh-huhs,” but real, focused, intentional listening.